Ranting Debes

Great face

2008-09-30T18:41:00.005+08:00

Hasn't Cliff got a GREAT FACE? Check out the great 'eye-brows' and ears and patterns on this dog's face. Isn't that just a GREAT FACE? A rags to riches story of little Cliff being dumped in a ditch as a puppy to grow up to be prince of the Dog Rescue, Cliff is simply GREAT.

Bye Squirrel-Dog!

2008-09-30T18:36:00.002+08:00

Squirrel-Dog is going to be fostered so I had to feature him before he goes. Here he is multi-tasking getting a tummy rub while posing for fans!

Siblings

2008-09-26T18:00:00.003+08:00

These two dogs are siblings and they have lots of fun confusing the volunteers at the Rescue about who is who. 'I'm Samba!' 'No, I am Samba. That's Burma.' etc. Dogs are so cool that they can mess with your head and you STILL love them.

Teriffic Terrier

2008-09-24T16:34:00.003+08:00

Batty craves affection like chocoholics crave Cadburys. But he also needs lots of walks. He was abandoned on the streets by some heartless moron who probably thought little dogs don't need much exercise. Terriers need loads! One part of energetic terrier-cross Batty's exercise routine is to see how high he can jump to lick you!

Food wars

2008-09-22T17:53:00.003+08:00

These dogs take a Time-Out from their food war.

Arfur the min-pin. vs Squirrel-Dog

Arfur's tactic is to bark consistently in Squirrel-Dog's face whilst hogging the food bowl.
vs
Squirrel-Dog's tactic is to completely ignore him and end up being hand-fed by the photographer in an 'IN YOUR FACE ROOMIE!' kind of a way.
Casualties: Me! It's very hard being neutral. I love them both! The anguish!

Dogs need exercise!

2008-09-18T16:15:00.004+08:00

Cockers are my ultimate fave dogs. An interview with Derek the cocker here would probably go along these lines...

Me: So, Derek, what is your favourite hobby?
Derek: Running. Chasing things. Running some more.
Me: How do you feel about public transport?
Derek: I love watching buses. I think bus-spotting is cool, I don't care what the other dogs say.Me: Who are your friends at the Rescue?
Derek: I really need my own dog space, but Fergus the schnauser comes up to my kennel for a chat. He's O.K.
Me: Why are you at the Rescue?
Derek: My owners didn't understand my needs. Lady, I NEED to run! They don't understand that dogs are great for getting owners in shape.
Me: Thanks Derek!
Derek: No probs. And hey! I saw you scoffing those instant noodles earlier; let me help you burn them off!

whiskers look good on a dog

2008-09-17T14:27:00.004+08:00

Can you see Fleur's wonderful whiskers? These awesome hunting and orienteering aids are yet another cool feature of dogs. Whiskers look great on female dogs, even though they don't look so hot on female humans.

Animal, vegetable or mineral?

2008-09-16T14:35:00.003+08:00

A sultana can be a small shrivelled grape (personally what I consider a shameful waste of a good white wine ingredient) or the wife of a sultan. It is also the name of this appealing Rescue dog. I think the people who abandoned him are more like shrivelled grapes.

Roaming Rescued Roma

2008-09-15T17:14:00.003+08:00

Roma is catwalk model puppeh but has the most undemanding of natures. She doesn't need Evian bottled water to get her fur looking glossy. She bravely ventured out for a walk today. Meanwhile, one of the schnausers got accidently locked in the food room. I guess there are worse places to be holed up in!

Clicker speaks out

2008-09-13T16:50:00.005+08:00

'Well, I think the schnausers are a cool bunch but mongrels are rather splendid dogs too. Particularly ME. No, wait ESPECIALLY ME.'

Schnauser power

2008-09-13T16:36:00.003+08:00

'WE ARE TAKING OVER THE KENNELS! SCHNAUSERS RULE! WE DEMAND GOLDEN FOOD BOWLS AND FIRST DIBBS ON VOLUNTEERS LAPS!
But first can I have a walk please?

A million schnausers

2008-09-12T14:57:00.006+08:00

It feels like there are a million schnausers at the Dog Rescue (well, 5) and I think they are planning a takeover. See them plotting in a huddle while making it look like they are just doing normal doggy activities? The cheeky white one might well be the ring leader. He looks shifty...

Pretty pups

2008-09-11T15:48:00.001+08:00

Two little mongrel boys take a rest out of the sun while 'angel' puppeh on the left watches over them. Aaaaahhhh!

Squirrel dog befriends rice cooker!

2008-09-10T15:16:00.004+08:00

Here's the squirrel/dog again, sitting beside his new friend, the rice cooker. Why do dogs love this cooker? It may just have something to do with the fact we boil chicken fillets in it. Chicken that when cool enough, will find its way into their tummies! The people who abandoned this little chap don't deserve chicken. They deserve to eat passed-its-sell-by-date SPAM for the rest of their lives!

Food table dog

2008-09-10T15:09:00.003+08:00

This cocker likes to lie on the table at the Rescue entrance, which, by an extraordinary coincidence, is also the table where food is dished out. This gourmet kindly samples all the other dog's food to 'check' it is up to standard. We have tried to explain to him that this is unnecessary. However, he sticks to the table and we stick to sighing and trying to lure him off with offers of walkies!

smug soon to be adopted doggeh

2008-09-09T17:04:00.003+08:00

This black smug-looking dog is getting adopted this week. See how she sits apart from the 'rabble' to pose for a few last kennel pics before heading off to be with a cool family who see how fabulous she is. A thousand blessings on that family and may they own many camels*.

*When I was 14 some bloke offered my dad 10 camels for my sister but only 1 for me. But as you can see, I can write about camels without any bitterness at all (*sob*).

DREADLOCK DOGGEH

2008-09-09T16:56:00.002+08:00

This dog has dreadlocks. Is he a Bob Marley fan? Not that I know of. What I do know is that he is too scared of humans to let us near him to cut those wild locks. For shame on the people who traumatised him to be like that. I bet they have really bad high school-yearbook-worthy-cringiness hair to match their scug characters. At least grosvenor can pull off dreadlocks.

Dogs remind us all of the importance of a good stretch

2008-09-06T12:57:00.004+08:00

Brave Bonzo and Equitable Eccles have a lot in common.
1. They are about the same size.
2. They both have big floppy ears.
3. They were both abandoned :(
4. They both remind us of the importance of a good stretch! They do this so they are then completely ready to use their legs to patter over to Rescue volunteers and get walkies / cuddles / treats / adoration :)

Dogs are INVENTIVE!

2008-09-05T14:30:00.005+08:00

Here's Kira proving how INVENTIVE dogs can be.
Here she demonstrates an alternative way to utilise a plastic chair.
Why sit ON it when you can LIE UNDER it and pretend to have your own CAMPING DEN? All Kira needs now is some blankets, a saucepan and some matches and she is ready for a camping adventure.*

*She will probably need an adult to help with lighting the camp fire though, as neither dogs nor children should play with matches. (Or people who have had more than four pints of beer.)

RANT over 'Squirrel dog'

2008-09-05T14:23:00.004+08:00

Here's the squirrel/pom again - Pip. He went for what was probably only his second walk ever today. The poor little chap didn't even know if it was safe to walk on soil or not and kept twirling around, a characteristic move for dogs who have spent their lives stuck in cages. Pip is now experiencing the joy of walkies, his tiny squirrely orange tail wagging happily as he explores the world his previous owners denied him. They should be incarcerated for years and see how they like it. I shake my fist at those people! Grrrrrrr!

Dogs make you LOOK CLEAN!

2008-09-04T15:38:00.006+08:00

This dog helps me LOOK GOOD. Here he is inspecting my leg, which, incidently, is smeared with cream cheese from dispensing meds. He looks, he inspects closer, then he carefully licks it all off, and voila! I LOOK CLEAN. The fact that I stink of dog is neither here nor there. His job is done.

Many dogs come to the Rescue badly neglected but here is a shining example of dogs not holding grudges. I hope the laundry bills of this dog's ex-owners are extortionate and their washing comes back two sizes too small and myseriously covered in indelible blue ink.

Bienvenue! Willkommen! WELCOME!

2008-09-04T15:23:00.004+08:00

Eccles can greet Dog Rescue volunteers in over 325 languages!!!
http://www.elite.net/~runner/jennifers/welcome.htm

O.K., he can't really speak 325 languages, but he can welcome volunteer speakers of all languages with his expectant doggy stance, bright eyes and open, relaxed mouth. Unless of course you are carrying an eye drop bottle or an ear drop bottle. In which case he will play a game called 'I can't see you and I definitely can't hear you' and put his agile paws over his eyes / ears (whichever one you are reaching for).

Nap time

2008-09-03T17:29:00.003+08:00

It's nap time at the kennels; either that or Tulip has passed out from sniffing another dog's feet. Meanwhile, two siblings dream of a hot tub full of treats rather than water...

Ugly Schmuggly!

2008-09-03T16:31:00.002+08:00

This cocker is incredibly ugly like some sort of failed experiment of Dr Frankenstein, and yet he is UTTERLY CUTE! He only has two little upturned fangs and a nose that is just, well, WRONG, and yet when his ADORABLE black fluffy paw pats my leg for a cuddle I can't imagine why anyone would have a) neglected and b) abandoned this delightful personality. I can't decide whether the people who abandoned him were mad scientists without consciences or just joyless jerks. It's 50/50.

Stand and deliver!

2008-09-02T15:16:00.004+08:00

Coral takes up the whole walkway.
'Stand and deliver the obligatory cheese/liver/chicken treat!'

Hard to believe anyone could have dumped her and her siblings when they were just tiny little puppies. The dumpee must have had a tiny little brain.

IN YOUR FACE DOGGEH!

2008-09-02T15:07:00.004+08:00

'In-your-face-Doggeh' tries to lick both me and the camera at the same time. It is confident and fearless and apparently likes the taste of metal so would make a great pet for a MEDIEVAL KNIGHT or an IRONMONGER or THE TERMINATOR. Oh no, wait, only the ones in Terminator 2 and 3. Terminator was EVIL in the first film and this dog deserves someone GOOD.
It is also good at getting lifts from obliging humans :)

RANT

2008-09-02T14:48:00.002+08:00

We've had quite a lot of dumped little dogs recently. Here's one scared terrier that we spent ages trying to coax out from his hideyhole on Sunday. He is called Mo Mo. His previous owners should be called 'LOATHSOME LOWLIFES'.

Hound of the Baskervilles Puppeh

2008-09-02T14:41:00.002+08:00

It is dusk at the kennels...the dogs are settling down for the night... when suddenly, sharpei youngster Jasper's green eyes start glowing and the volunteers realise they are dealing with no ordinary puppy! He is The Hound of the DogRescuvilles!*

*Only he is more interested in LICKING HUMANS TO DEATH than frightening them to death.

Another animal?

2008-09-01T15:50:00.003+08:00

This dog is looking a bit nude from the front. From the back though its very short coat but fluffy mane-like head and long tail make it look like a LION! Raar!
It hasn't learnt how to actually roar yet, but male lions generally relax in the sun while their females do all the running about in the hot sun so it's got the stance right.*

It's previous owners deserve to get bad hair cuts too. Preferably mullets.

* The dog is female, so I am using artistic blog license here.

Dogs can disguise themelves!

2008-09-01T15:41:00.003+08:00

Dogs can be CUNNING. This 14 year old plucky pomeranian pooch disguises itself as a SQUIRREL! Orange - check; small - check; fluffy tail- check; tiny squirrely features - check!
How better to get the attention of Dog Rescue volunteers that to make yourself look like an entirely different mammal so they think 'Hey! What's that squirrel doing in here? Better pick it up and move it...Oh wait! It's a cute little pom. Ha ha! Well, now it is in my arms I might as well give it a cuddle...'

Sharpei puppeh has wrinkles!

2008-08-30T17:44:00.002+08:00

This is a puppeh post just BECAUSE. Enjoy!
Have you melted yet? :)

Dogs know how to STAND OUT in a crowd

2008-08-29T14:02:00.005+08:00

How many Rescue dogs are in this picture?
a) twelfty
b) 3
c) lots

Yes, that's right, the correct answer is 'lots'. But notice how 'pirate' black and tan Bart manages to make himself STAND OUT in the crowd of doggies? Dogs have PRESENCE!

I bet the people who abandoned his parents (featured before) couldn't stand out even if they were wearing jump suits made of real gold and singing German opera through megaphones.

A change!

2008-08-29T13:52:00.003+08:00

I'm not a big fan of change. In fact, I am a self-confessed anal-retentive who loves routine. However, this picture my sister took of my dad's dogs made me decide to have a different type of post. Here is an example of not-abandoned, happy, well-looked after dogs (parsons). The one with its head turned towards my dad (no doubt questioning his attire) is a great character. The little one I haven't met yet, so all I can say with 100% certainty is that it's SO CUTE! Aaaahhhhh!

Dogs are great for TICKLING

2008-08-29T13:42:00.003+08:00

This is my favourite abandoned min pin again being tickled by moi. He loves it. Heck, he deserves it!

His previous owners do not deserve to be gently tickled in a playful and loving way. They deserve to be crushed in the powerful metal claws of giant mechanical crabs.

Ninja Husky!

2008-08-28T10:52:00.004+08:00

Can you see the handsome husky hiding in this picture? He is a ninja husky, trained in the stealthy arts!

O.K. that may be a lie, but if it was the Arctic, rather than Hong Kong, Polar would make a fantastic ninja as he would blend in to the snow.

Hong Kong has no snow. What a waste of talent.

Dogs can colour co-ordinate

2008-08-28T10:21:00.003+08:00

These dogs are very clever. They have sorted themselves out according to colour! The orangey ones are on the right, but the one with black is on the left. Their two matching pals stand nearby. Good effort dogs!

Plastic surgery for pets = lobotomies for stupid owners

2008-08-26T13:30:00.004+08:00

These schnausers came together and were scared stiff when they arrived, but it is better than where they were before - kept in cages all the time - that is, when their owners weren't taking the male one to get plastic surgery to make him 'look better' in his cage. I'd like to get their pernicious previous owners into surgery. Two lobotomies coming right up! The dogs are perfect, it is the owners who should be stuck in cages and see how they like it. Yeah, cages suspended over a pit of boiling acid, gently lowered one inch per hour...

DEVIOUS DOGS

2008-08-26T13:24:00.005+08:00

It's the GR and 'Z' in a double attack of emotional blackmail. "Let us through the gate. You know you want to...OPEN THE GATE!" The head tilt, the big brown eyes, the GR's tongue...Aaaggghhhh! Helpless... to... resist...

See 'Z' here earlier practsing the head tilt action. Dogs are DEVIOUS in a GOOD WAY.

HOW???

2008-08-25T16:42:00.004+08:00

HOW, I mean HOW could anyone abandon this adorable cling-on dog? It fits snuggly in human arms, doesn't wriggle about, and looks uber cute. It spent a lot of time being carried around yesterday as a big golden retriever decided it was in love with it but the feelings weren't mutual.

Dogs can be quality entertainers!

2008-08-25T16:35:00.004+08:00

Snoozing away, then suddenly...AWAKE! This little fella did a startled chipmunk* impression on Sunday. Quality entertainer!

* http://video.google.com/videosearch?q=startled%20prairie%20dog&rls=com.microsoft:en-us:IE-SearchBox&ie=UTF-8&oe=UTF-8&sourceid=ie7&rlz=1I7ADBS&um=1&sa=N&tab=iv#

Why am I barking?

2008-08-23T12:44:00.006+08:00

Is this tail-wagging, barking little dog saying:

a) come in here and I will bite your legs off;

or b) come in here and give me a cuddle;

or c) I have not decided whether to eat you or lick you yet but come in here anyway?

It's b of course! How could he bite my legs off? He is just over one foot tall and I am five foot nine! If you thought a) or c) you are rather silly. He is happily wagging his tail*.

He is nothing like the person in this awesome clip: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kNKSzmM44gE

* although that in itself is not always an indication that the dog is not going to use his little teeth, but the restof his posture says 'O.K.'

Dogs love a CHALLENGE!

2008-08-23T12:30:00.002+08:00

Batty, who was found as a stray, is new to kennels and keen to show off to the others just how street-smart and street-cool he is. See how he artfully climbs the fence and once at the top does a celebratory sniff of a new friend? The little fella makes it look EFFORTLESS and yet I speak from experience (last Monday's post) when I say that climbing fences and walls is not as easy as it looks! Young Master Batty is the SIR EDMUND HILLARY of the kennels.

In contrast, whoever dumped derring-do dog Batty is THE WEAKEST LINK! Goodbye!

Golden Retrievers are innocents!

2008-08-21T11:30:00.005+08:00

See this lovely, gentle, innocent GR?

Which is worse?

a) Dumping your family pet of 8 years.

or

b) Spotting a sweet baby that has one leg in a cast and is holding candy and a rattle toy - then deliberately putting on a scary clown mask before racing over and snatching the candy out of the baby's innocent chubby hand - then stamping hard on the rattle so it breaks before the now weeping infant's eyes - then signing the cast 'Life Long Loser' - and then cackling hideously as you run away with your spoils, leaving the infant emotionally scared for life.

That's right, it's a. The golden retriever is being hurt by someone it has KNOWN AND LOVED.

The return of STORM

2008-08-20T16:28:00.006+08:00

Drum roll please!~ Presenting Storm as you've never seen him before!

Notice how finally the hormones have worn off after he was desexed and that now he is actually able to be in the same kennel with another dog without trying to mate with it!

SAY 'YES' TO DESEXING YOUR DOG!

Storm is actually lying on the cool floor rather than going on a testosterone-fueled rampage in the hot sun! For the first time tantalisingly pretty schnauser Cookie can relax safely only yards away from this once notorious lothario!

Dogs with addictions need help!

2008-08-20T15:11:00.006+08:00

This little white schnauser has a problem. He is an ADDICT.
He is addicted to SNIFFING. He sniffs other dogs, plant pots, humans taking photos...he relentlessly sniffs them all!

This olfactory-crazed sniffing schnauser needs help! He is so addicted that he wouldn't even lift his little head up to pose for a photo! His lilttle doggy nose goes at it all day.

After a day at the kennels one does tend to whiff a bit, but the rotters who adandoned this lively boy STINK!

Dogs can be PATIENT

2008-08-19T15:14:00.007+08:00

This dog is PATIENTLY waiting to be let out.

Notice how he is not shoving, barking, jostling, poking, prodding or generally being obnoxious in his desire to get from a (inside the gate) to b (outside the gate).

Now why can't people using public transport systems here be like that? Today I was shoulder wrestled, poked with a bag, hit by another shoulder and jostled just getting to work. Grrrrrrrr.

To calm myself I shall gaze at this handsome fellow's picture. So furrrrrryyyyyyy.

Dogs have ATTITUDE!

2008-08-19T13:54:00.004+08:00

This is a dog with ATTITUDE. See how he strolls off, refusing to have his photograph taken by a mere human underling?

The people who abandoned him probably couldn't get over the inferiority complexes they must have developed living with this cool dog.

And yet I feel NO PITY for them.

Dogs do IMPRESSIONS!

2008-08-19T13:47:00.003+08:00

This dog is doing an impression of a wet dishcloth!
During his bath, Bumpy decided to wow us with his impressions. Meanwhile, Arfur (featured yesterday) was hiding under his white towel and moving around in a spooky way, keen to wow us with his impression of a ghost! Thanks guys!

Another Puggy Pug Gets Pampered!

2008-08-18T17:32:00.003+08:00

This PERFECT PUGGY PUG got adopted yesterday by a fine, upstanding, responsible human. Before that, he showed his potential for becoming a pampered pet by getting us to bathe and groom and generally fuss over him. Yes, indeed, in this picture I am actually tickling his neck, not in fact strangling him. That would be wrong.

Puppeh plays HOUSE!

2008-08-18T14:42:00.006+08:00

The urge to ring the doorbell is a strong one...
how could anyone abandon a dog that plays house?

Maybe someone that would prefer to have a dog that plays poker.

Anyhoo, there is no excuse for abandoning a puppy, except maybe if you own a mutant puppy intent on world domination, and even then I think you should reconsider.

Dogs have PERSONALITY!

2008-08-18T13:21:00.006+08:00

Just because a dog is small, it doesn't mean that it won't have a BIG personality. Arfur here knows what he wants:

1. Total domination of the food bowl.

2. A soft towel to frolick with.

3. Your attention please!

See how happy he is right now? He has the food, the attention and he has spotted the fresh towel I am holding!

His previous owners should have bought more towels.

And been less RUBBISH.

Dogs can act like Steve McQueen!

2008-08-18T11:10:00.006+08:00

See how sweet and innocent this beautiful faced dog looks? You'd never know she had a WILD CHILD side, involving her doing a Steve McQueen and escaping from the kennels that very afternoon (but without the use of a motorbike). She made her dramatic escape through a locked up construction site. I got boosted over a corrugated iron wall and tramped over unstable rubble in pursuit of this girl. She even looked back and watched my stumbling efforts to climb after her before she hot-footed it into the tropical wilderness near by. Cheeky monkey!

The good news is, a few hours later, she came back of her own volition, no doubt with adventures of doggy hijinx to impress the others. Dogs sometimes want to do their own thing, which in this case meant ESCAPING in a DRAMATIC way.*

But you have to admire the way she had kept that facade of innocence up for so long!

She'll probably get them all building an escape tunnel next.

*When they come to us though it should always be to be received with loving arms, even if you are covered in scratches and bruises.

Puppy drool has magical properties

2008-08-16T11:42:00.005+08:00

O.K., that post title may be a teeny bit of a lie, but it does seem magical how being covered in puppy saliva creates a sense of euphoria. See how Ludo is airing his tongue in preparation for licking a human? He pays particular attention to the hands and necks of his humans, carefully covering every inch of furless flesh in magical puppy slobber. He takes pride in her slobbering work. What a model pup!

Dogs are LOYAL 2

2008-08-15T14:50:00.003+08:00

Here's another image of King John, described by historians as 'slippery' and 'untrustworthy' with his dog. See that medieval mutt frolicking merrily with his evil master? Even the puppy behind him looks happy. Further proof that dogs love UNCONDITIONALLY.

Dogs are brilliantly MANIPULATIVE!

2008-08-15T12:01:00.004+08:00

See how this puggy pug uses his awesome powers of manipulation to make you want to open the kennel dog and give him a squishy hug whilst going 'You're so cute' and 'It's O.K. baby puggly wuggly' (not that I am saying that I actually say that sort of thing). Dogs are BILLIANTLY MANIPULATIVE! Within seconds he was in my lap.

Puggy Pug Pugs!

2008-08-15T11:46:00.007+08:00

A lot of pugs get abandoned, usually because the owners have either let them get so fat* that they cut off the blood circulation when you hold them on your lap, or because they have medical problems that the MALODOROUS OWNERS can't be bothered to get treated. This chap just needs eyedrops AND SOME LOVIN'. Look at this pug's gorgeous brown baubly eyes! Check out the tiny whiskers and squishy nose! This soft wrinkly-headed chap could melt the coldest of hearts, but apparently his last owner's heart was made of STONE.

* From being over-fed and under-walked.

Get your dogs desexed!

2008-08-15T11:32:00.005+08:00

Storm, the white fluffy sex-maniac featured last month, is seen here creeping up on an unsuspecting corgi. Storm has been stalking several dogs at once in the kennels, reflecting the need for dogs to be DESEXED so they don't turn into roaming lotharios. Storm's had the snip now, but it takes a month for the hormones to leave the system. In the meantime, thanks Storm for continuing to entertain us with your antics! Also, thank you cute corgi, 'B', now adopted, for being so PATIENT and for not pressing charges!

No rants or raves today

2008-08-14T17:07:00.001+08:00

Too much TMJD today so not r & r from this blogger. Sorry!

Spaniels have FABULOUS FLOPPY FURRRY EARS

2008-08-13T13:08:00.004+08:00

I love spaniels. Just wanted to share that. This one at the Rescue is a real sweetheart and I think HE KNOWS IT. Check out the floppy ear action! He could do an advertisement for dog shampoo and shake those ears for maximum effect like in the timotei adverts.

Great dogs from THE PAST!

2008-08-13T10:16:00.004+08:00

Neatorama has a good link about some RAVE-WORTHILY REMARKABLE dogs in history: http://www.neatorama.com/2008/08/11/and-my-dogs-cant-even-roll-over/

I think a special mention should go to the dogs belonging to King John of England (1199-1216) possibly the most unpopular English king ever. See his dogs lovingly follow their tyrannical, treacherous, homicidal master? Further proof that dogs are GREAT because they LOVE UNCONDITIONALLY!*

Unfortunately, people who dump sick or old dogs like Mouse (featured yesterday) DON'T love unconditionally.

*Love humans that is, not stags. I think the stag in this picture is pretty much done for.

Is it really wrong to shoot neglectful owners?

2008-08-12T13:31:00.005+08:00

This lovely, tiny, fragile ball of fluff is 10. He has no teeth and a wonky jaw so he finds it hard to eat. So what did his previous owners do?

a) Take him to a vet and get the best possible care for him.
b) Dump him.

Yes, b.

What would I like to do to those heartless people?

a) Feed them to the large meat-loving sturgeon at Ocean Park?
b) Push them into an erupting volcano which is about to spew red hot sizzling lava?
c) Force them to organise England's 2012 Olympic opening ceremony?

Yes, definitely C. A and B would be too quick.

Puppehs have AMBITION!

2008-08-12T13:24:00.007+08:00

This lonesome puppeh seems to be practsiing getting into strange positions. Perhaps he has plans to become A CONTORTIONIST. He has AMBITION! While his friends and sister are playing 'let's swamp the human with the camera' he is working towards his goal. Follow your dream, ambitious puppeh!

Dogs can ACT!

2008-08-11T13:42:00.007+08:00

There should be more movies with dogs in. Dogs can ACT. There should be a dog RADA or something. See how this dog, 'Z'* APPEARS to be sleeping? Actually, it is wide awake and just PRETENDING to be asleep so that I won't give it it's eye drops. Later it PRETENDED to be fascinated by something happening on the other side of the kennels, just when I was again approaching with the eye drops. Z, you would win a Dog Oscar for sure!

I bet Z's previous owners never won an award.

*(real identity protected in case he decides on a movie career later)

Dogs can turn INVISIBLE!

2008-08-11T13:33:00.008+08:00

Dogs have superpowers! Canine 'Z' has amazing powers as well as great acting skills. Can you spot this dog in the photograph?

No? That's because it can turn invisible!* It did this when I was approaching for the third time with the eyedrop bottle (it was fourth tie lucky in the end).

* Some have erroneously claimed that Z moved before I pressed the button on the camera, but that's just nonsense.

The COURAGE, the FORTITUDE, the FURRINESS!

2008-08-11T13:29:00.004+08:00

Another rave! This dog has been blind from birth and he's STILL SMILING! He also has an incredible tail which could probably exist in it's own right as a small furry mammal.

More puppehs

2008-08-11T13:06:00.003+08:00

The best thing about this puppy is that it has a sibling! Double puppeh joy! There are no words to describe how cute this puppy is. 100% FACT! :) There are many words to describe the previous owners of this puppy, but they are not nice ones.

SON OF PIRATE DOGS!

2008-08-09T13:59:00.005+08:00

This is Bart, son of the dogs featured yesterday, who has the same name as a FAMOUS PIRATE! Rrraaarrr! http://www.thepiratesrealm.com/Bartholomew%20Roberts.html

Unlike this pirate, Bart has not attacked 400 ships, killed dozens of seadogs or obtained 50 million pounds of loot. Instead, he just lazes around the kennels and submits to petting by his kennel volunteer fans.

Pity about the loot bit.

PIRATES! DESERTED ISLANDS! DOGS!

2008-08-08T16:31:00.007+08:00

OK, I don't know for sure that these dogs were actually marooned with their pirate owners as they were found sans humans, but they definitely came from boats. They were found living on a remote deserted island and had puppies together. The devoted canine 'Mr and Mrs Crusoe' have gorgeous natures and all but one of their children has now been adopted. Their hobbies are smooching, walking, licking volunteers and eating. The pirates who dumped them on the island were heartless and cold-blooded (typical pirate behaviour, but still, very wrong).

Dogs provide awesome aaaaahhhh moments

2008-08-07T16:36:00.004+08:00

Courtesy of www.cuteoverload.com's daily offerings: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tE6i7H2v5I0&eurl=http://mfrost.typepad.com/cute_overload/

This made me feel heaps better today after a night of TMJD pain. POM POM POMMY JOY.

This too, although it has nothing to do with dogs:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=g9Qu3iP3RYA

Springers need exercise

2008-08-06T12:11:00.005+08:00

The clue is in the name - 'springer' spaniel. 'To spring' means to leap forward. This suggests energy and action. The mush-for-brains-people who gave up this beautiful springer at the kennels last week took it out - wait for it - ONCE a week. Yes, only ONCE. And they wondered why it had some behavioural problems. I think I would have behavioural problems if I didn't go out each day. I'd probably spend my days of confinement surfing the net, finding out how to build a laser beam out of everyday household objects and blast my way out. This dog is not so techno-savy, so he just nipped them instead. Fair enough.

Dogs can bring BOOZE

2008-08-06T11:51:00.007+08:00

Aaaaahhhhh. Wine....Beer....G&Ts...and DOGS

Saint Bernards are AWESOME because they carry brandy in little kegs around their necks. They can also find people trapped in snow and probably know karate too.

http://hk.youtube.com/watch?v=WewdcMDSNm8 (ignore silly jaws soundtrack)
This black lab is FLIPPING FANTASTIC. For some reason its misguided owner thought the bottom of the swimming pool was the fridge and dropped their beer there. The DUTIFUL DOG, realising the urgent need their kerfuffled human had for beer, dived gracefully in to get it! I bet this dog could also mix a perfect cocktail.

Unfortunately, the dog on the right is carrying a useless non-alcoholic bottle of lucozade. This is not the fault of the dog. It is the owner's fault for not training him properly. This just highlights how vital it is to take your dog for training classes.

Lassie's owner was IRRESPONSIBLE

2008-08-05T10:46:00.006+08:00

Dogs are not there to get you out of every stupid scrape you get yourself into while pretending to be a cowboy or sheriff or other such nonsense. If you fall in a well, use your mobile phone and call THE EMERGENCY SERVICES. Don't call your dog to follow your stupidity by leaping in to save you. It wasn't the dog who wasn't watching what they were doing. Or, if you must try and single-handedly apprehend a gang of cockney armed criminals, don't whistle for your dog to come and steal their guns with his teeth while you distract them. It could put him in danger. Call the emergency srvices. THAT'S WHAT THEY'RE FOR! Timmy was an IRRESPONSIBLE DOG OWNER.

Did you know that 'Lassie' is a trademark for a type of collie dog which is only descended from Pal, the first Lassie? There is no trademark for 'Timmy' because he is a LIABILITY.

Bunny owners?

2008-08-04T17:19:00.006+08:00

Perhaps I should start ranting about undesirable owners of bunnies too? This made me smile!

http://www.gamaniak.com/video-2822-presto-pixar.html

Not a lion

2008-08-04T11:01:00.004+08:00

This dog is HUMUNGOUS, golden, has 4 legs and a tail and has big teeth LIKE A LION. Thankfully he is NOT A LION, so when I was giving him his medicine in chicken yesterday he didn't eat my arm along with it, although I had to withdraw my pinkies pretty quickly as his mouth is enormous. His name is Victor, and he certainly is an OVERCOMER, as his evil former owner kept him and his mum and sister on a rooftop with no shelter, no exercise and no interaction with humans and yet HE IS STILL AFFECTIONATE and a SOFTIE; again, not like most lions, who would probably have POUNCED ON AND EATEN Victor's previous crummy owner. In this respect, it is a shame Victor is not a lion. Nom nom nom nom nom!

On dogs, hairy ears look good

2008-08-04T10:28:00.007+08:00

This dog has the FLUFFIEST ears in the kennels. On him, hirsute ears are an asset. On humans, they are very much associated with being hit with the ugly stick. Look at the close-up of his left fluffy ear. Are you not MOVED by the fluff? Are you not at this very moment going 'AaaaaaaahhhHH!' His previous owners probably couldn't concentrate on their everyday lives because they were besotted with the fluff. I'd rather think that was the reason they abandoned him, rather than them being VILE HEARTLESS CHEAPSKATES who didn't want to pay for his operation to remove cysts. No, I'd much rather think it was the fluffiness.

Dogs are COOL

2008-08-04T10:07:00.004+08:00

Look at this cool dog. He is so cool walking away with the treats he has just swiped. He knows he rules. He doesn't need designer sunglasses and a leather coat to look cool.

His previous owners were NOT COOL. I am happy to report this dog is SO COOL that's it's new, discerning owners are HIS PETS! They love this dog. Because he is COOL.

Pitt Bulls vs Houdini

2008-08-02T10:17:00.006+08:00

Another RAVE! Pitt bulls could easily become famous escapologists. In a contest between Houdini and this pitt bull currently at the Rescue, the pitt bull would win.

HOUDINI, famous American escape artist: Escapes from milk cans, chains, prisons, straight jackets, Chinese water torture devices and locked boxes. Escapology rating: 10.
Cuteness rating: O. That hair parting is just wrong.
Smugness rating: O. He died when someone punched him in the guts and did in his appendix.
TRUDY, a pitt bull at the Rescue: Escapes from kennels, shut doors, tiny spaces between volunteer's legs and the kennel door' leashes and penned in areas.
Cuteness rating: At least 9
Smugness rating: 10. See her SMUGGLY lying on the tumble dryer which is on the washing machine in the STAFF ROOM when she should be in her locked kennel?

Finish them!!!!!

2008-08-02T09:58:00.003+08:00

This is what I feel like crying out in support when I see some fine, upstanding member of the community berating some MORON who is about to dump their pet. I think it should be legal to slam dunk these SELFISH RATFINKS. Wham!

DOG E-CARDS

2008-08-01T14:44:00.007+08:00

This website is something to RAVE about rather than RANT, especially as humans and animals both get helped through clicking: www.theanimalrescuesite.com/clickToGive/selectecard.faces?siteId=3

Personally, I prefer the more abusive and insulting www.someecards.com but that's just me.

Dogs can AIM

2008-08-01T14:13:00.007+08:00

Time for a rant about something else.

You've been to the cinema to watch a film about SUPER DOGS rescuing Tokyo from a giant mutant lizard. Then you queue up with all the other audience members who need to go. You squeeze into the cubicle. There before you is a DISGUSTING MESS. WHY can't people be clean? It isn't hard. Heck, we get daily practise yet people still leave A FOUL MESS. AIM people, AIM and WIPE. Or, if you are using the open toilet in a remote Chinese village and are a western tourist, aim, wipe and SMILE for your audience! Do not get all shy and embarrassed and drop the loo paper.
Like I did.

Dogs do not soil their own territory. Usually. Human beings seem to do it all the time! Why can't people keep the toilet clean? This is Eccles on the right; he makes perfect pretty poo circles every time! I bet his previous owner couldn't. Unfortunately, he makes them anywhere. But he does this cute manouevre of putting his paws over his eyes as if playing peek a boo with you. You can't get annoyed with a dog that can do that cute trick. Humans don't do this so they cannot get away with not aiming. YOU ARE JUST NOT CUTE ENOUGH PEOPLE!

OWNERS who import HUSKIES to TROPICAL COUNTRIES are CLINCIALLY INSANE

2008-07-31T14:29:00.006+08:00

ARE YOU CLINICALLY INSANE? NOT SURE?
Then take the HUSKY TEST!

1. Do you think that it is appropriate to import large dogs with thick fur and who need lots of exercise to tropical countries because 'hey, why not, they look good'?

a) No b) Yes

If you answer was a) No, - congratulations! You are not mad.

If you are answer was b) Yes, - I urge you to seek urgent medical attention of the psychiatric variety.

We have three huskies at the kennels right now. The people who imported them NEED HELP.

In Soviet Russia, DOG OWNS YOU!

2008-07-31T14:18:00.005+08:00

This is a partital pic of me holding the VERY dog (featured yesterday) who bit me the VERY day before this picture was taken. You have to respect how this VERY CRAFTY mutt insinuated herself into my arms. In Hong Kong, as in Soviet Russia, DOG OWNS YOU!
Crafty dog: 1.
Me/humans in general: 0.

100% FACT!

2008-07-30T15:40:00.005+08:00

PUPPY FACT 1: It is impossible to be angry while saying the word 'PUPPEH'.
PUPPY FACT 2: It is possible to physically MELT on exposure to very cute puppehs.
PUPPY FACT 3: People who RUTHLESSLY abandon cute puppehs are officially on the Dark Side of the Force and one day some young robe-wearing light-sabre wielding jedi will TAKE THEM OUT.

Dogs are SMART

2008-07-30T15:26:00.006+08:00

This is Zip. He would make an AWESOME guard dog. Look how ALERT he is! He barks at strangers but he licks his female friends and likes to climb them and get up by their shoulder - like a parrot. But, unlike some bird daft enough to get caught by an illiterate smelly pirate, Zip is SMART. He is posing here whilst guarding the TREAT BOX.
Zip 1.
Parrots 0.
Zip's Previous Owners -1.

Dogs can do CUTE POSES

2008-07-30T14:09:00.005+08:00

This is Arfur. He is a tiny min-pin who was dumped for having skin which has been neglected so CRIMINALLY long that he has grey, leathery patches and chronic dandruff. AND YET he is also still capable of doing CUTE POSES. How many humans do you know who can pose like that whilst sporting a mane of dandruff? ZERO, I'm guessing. Arfur is responding well to medicated baths after which he likes to frolic with the towel. He licks my hand with his pink micro-tongue. He is therefore CUTE. His HEARTLESS former owners are not cute at all.

Dogs teach TOLERANCE

2008-07-30T12:50:00.005+08:00

This is Fatty. He is the first dog I got to know at the Rescue. He also taught me ACCEPTANCE and TOLERANCE. Notice he is a 'ging-er'. He was a fluffy, sweet, gentle soul. I used to mock all ging-ers, with their carrot like hair / ridiculous-coloured fur. But now I have learnt that ging-ers may just have feelings too. THANK YOU FATTY R.I.P.

The CALLOUS CURS who abandoned LOVELY FATTY because he was old and sick should be staked out in honey and left for fire ants. Fireants = Natures little ginger ninjas.

Disclaimer: It is still open season on Welsh ging-ers.

It is CRUEL to name your dog Princess Coochy Poo

2008-07-30T11:25:00.004+08:00

Why do INTELLECTUALLY CHALLENGED people give their dogs such DIRE names? I mean WHY?

I have honestly heard mentioned and/or met: Pinky Chick, Rainbow, Milk, Belly, Amus, Potato and Dark Soul for HUMANS in Hong Kong and China. So it should not really surprise me that the dogs get named as badly.
ACCEPTABLE names for dogs: Rover, Spike, Lassie, Patch and Kevin (all right, that last one is debatable).
NON-ACCEPTABLE names: Mao (which means 'cat' in Cantonese - are you ACTIVELY TRYING to cause your animal to have a SPECIES IDENTITY CRISIS?), Fifi (try not blushing over that one while calling your dog to you - the SHAME), Pickle (dogs are not food in Hong Kong - don't give your dogs names which make them sound edible. You may confuse tourists.) and Winkie (no wait, that was a human I met, but still WRONG for a dog anyway.)
This blogger understands: http://www.halfbakery.com/idea/Sensible_20Pet_20Names
Let's have COMPULSORY IQ TESTSs for people who want to have dogs!

STUPID PEOPLE cause UNHEALTHY dogs

2008-07-30T09:36:00.007+08:00

Look at this dog. Does it look well? Is it hale and hearty? OF COURSE NOT! It has overly big gunky eyes and teeth that Satan would be proud of. It also bit me once, but that's not the point. It is one of those breeds that get sick easily because they are bred to be small and cute with unnaturally big eyes. These dogs end up with breathing problems, joint problems, spinal problems - you name it, they suffer from it, all because STUPID humans treat them like TOYS rather than animals. I would be lying if I said there was anything awesome about this particular dog. But there is something; it has AMAZINGLY sharp teeth!!!

A MAGNIFICENT beast

2008-07-30T09:03:00.003+08:00

This is Taffy. He is MAGNIFICENT because he has orange fur yet can carry off a red bandana. He would look great in a plastic bag bandana! The MANIACS who dumped Taffy should be exposed to ridicule and shame on some frivolous reality show.

An AWESOME cocker

2008-07-29T18:39:00.005+08:00

This is Tarzan, my FAVOURITIST doggeh of all time at the rescue, now adopted by two FINE specimens of humanity. Look at those brown eyes and beautiful reddish-brown coat and the way he is master of his green doggy bed! The people who abandoned Tarzan should be either very slowly eaten by mutant bees or made to watch Oprah Winfrey EVERY WAKING HOUR for the rest of their lives. I cannot decide which is worse.

Latest dumped doggeh goes on lusty rampage

2008-07-29T16:48:00.005+08:00

This is Storm. Dogs react in different ways to being dumped. Storm decided to go on a lusty rampage trying to have his way with every dog (male or female) within reach before finally deciding that he was in love with a volunteer's leg. DOGS ARE AWESOME because they ENTERTAIN us with their brilliantly bawdy antics. Thanks Storm!

Top 5 true RUBBISH reasons given for abandoning a dog

2008-07-29T16:32:00.008+08:00

These are reasons I have come across in the past few months alone for people dumping LOVELY DOGGEHS:

1. "We didn't know dogs need taking for walks. It is inconvenient." (MORON ALERT!!!)
2. "It grew." (MORON'S CLONE)
3. "We don't need it any more." (SELFISH SCUMBAGS and what on earth did they mean by 'need'?????)
4. "I don't really want it anymore. Anyway, it should be glad we gave it 5 months of a loving home." (O.K., that was said about a cat but the point remains - animals are NEVER glad to have had time in your home if you then DUMP them into a new bewildering environment. In fact, they are less likely to be adopted by someone else as they are either over the uber-cute puppy / kitten stage so less desirable, or so MESSED UP by being abandoned that they have abandonment anxiety disorder, AKA M.O.A.N. disorder - My Owners Are Numbskulls. FOOL!)
5. "It barks." (Yes, FOOL 2, it is a dog, that's what they do if they are left alone all day in a tiny HK apartment with nothing to do. DUH.)

What am I ranting about?

2008-07-29T16:06:00.000+08:00

A good old rant can do wonders. It can help relieve pent up anger and frustration without a person resorting to actual physical violence. I can rant about pretty much anything but mainly I want to RANT about the INCREDIBLY DUMB PEOPLE who abandon their dogs for STUPID REASONS* which makes me want to punch them on the nose and generally drop kick any part of their bodies my foot can get at. However, apart from that I also want to RAVE about the AWESOME DOGS I work with, because www.cuteoverload.com and http://icanhascheezburger.com/aren't always quite enough to satisfy my cravings for cute canines and felines, and besides, blogs should be happy places full of "joy and joyness".

*the only acceptable reason would be that the owner is in hospital and/or physically incapacitated and has callous 'friends' and relatives who won't take their pooch in.